BOSTON, MA

[August 31, 2001]

SHASNA MediaWatch department follows news analysis, commentaries, trends, news reports and press releases of the week. We pay special attention to Somali news in general, and to Arab financed and UN supported ‘ARTA SUB-CLAN’ in particular. We analyze, digest and separate facts from fiction. With so many news outlets and so many groups, each one vying for your attention, we will try our very best to fairly analyze what you have read or missed reading.

By P.J.O'Rourke . Mr. O'Rourke is a writer for the Atlantic Monthly. His latest book, "The CEO of the Sofa," has just been published by The Atlantic Monthly Press.

Are Americans pursuing a misguided course of unilateralism? Are we failing to cooperate and coordinate with other countries in matters such as the Kyoto climate treaty, missile defense, and peace processes in the Middle East, the Balkans and elsewhere? Are we telling foreigners to go pound sand?

But we are foreigners. Every person in America came from, or is descended from someone who came from, somewhere else, even if it was 30,000 years ago on a land bridge across the Bering Strait. Of course we're unilateral. If we Americans had wanted to be ordered around by English wig-tops, French functionaries, bossy Germans, disorganized Italians, tin-pot Latin American dictators, and Ice Age Siberian bureaucrats, we would have stayed where we were. And in the case of us Americans who were shipped here, due to slavery or exile, we could have gone back. Both the history of Liberia and the type of American who lives in Paris indicate this is a bad idea.

Being foreigners ourselves, we know what you other foreigners are up to with your Faustian bargaining sessions, your venomous covenants, lying alliances, greedy agreements, back-stabbing ententes cordiales, and trick-or-treat treaty ploys. Count us out.

And, while we're counting, let's count all the nations on the face of the earth that really count. The number seems to be one. Russia used to be a superpower but resigned "to spend more time with the family." China is supposed to be mighty. But the Chinese leadership sweats and trembles when a couple hundred Falun Gong members show up in Tianamen Square for a mass tai chi workout.

The United States, with 4.5% of the world's population and 6% of its land area, produces one-fifth of everything in the world. And we consume even more than that. No nation compares to America in wealth. Certainly not Japan. Japan turned out to be a macroeconomic Pokemon craze. Impoverished citizens of the developing world do not wade the Pacific in the middle of the night seeking a better life in Japan.

No nation compares to America in influence. American fashions, entertainment, aspirations and ideals dominate the planet the way Chandra Levy dominates Fox News. Britain, France and Germany are obscure branch offices of American culture and may be closed in the interests of rational consolidation.

As for comparisons in matters of life and death, America spends more on defense than the next 12 top defense-spending countries combined. If the U.S. is going to be involved in military multilateralism, it should ask its partner nations that ancient question of diplomacy, "You and what army?"

What is the point of multilateralism? Is it supposed to prevent wars? There aren't many wars at the moment -- except in Israel, Macedonia and a few other places where multilateralism has been attempted. Is nuclear holocaust to be prevented? America's unilateral missile-defense system will do that, albeit unilaterally. And, by the way, how come all the people who were so in favor of unilateral nuclear disarmament are so opposed to unilateral protection against nukes?

Is the environment to be cleaned up? What's needed for environmental cleanup is money. America has most of it. A Kyoto treaty that damages the American economy is not going to leave us Americans with extra money to help you foreigners recycle your trash -- like all those corrupt, deposed dictators you're always sending here.

Or is the point of multilateralism simply that America is expected to imitate the elder and better nations of Europe? They, in their wisdom, decided that their continent did not have enough government and needed one more big one. After Hitler, Napoleon and Attila the Hun, the Europeans should know where this leads. Undeterred by historical example, however, the EU looks to fulfill the age-old dream of having a country of English cooks, German lovers, French defense forces and Italian efficiency experts.

America is not an insular country. Unilateralism is not isolationism. America has always been outward-looking, as the beleaguered Sioux and high-tailing Mexican armies of the century before last could testify. An isolationist America would mean New York State champagne and Mississippi catfish caviar. And there is an intrinsic element of the multilateral in the American character. Look at our malls. We are perfectly willing to accept what the rest of the world deems good -- if it comes in attractive colors.

But the rest of the world should not push America too far with claims upon international relations. The earth is not a family. And only an idiot would try multilateralism in a family, anyway. If you foreigners want America to join in a family marriage of nations, fine. But I warn you, we will be a strict dad. Because it's our planet. And we said so.

Other books by P.J. O’Rourke: Parliament of Whores; Eat the Rich; All the Trouble in the World; The Enemies List; Give War a Chance; and more other bestselling titles.

Commentary on the commentary: Somali perspective

Somalis, just like their fellow Americans, are ingenious citizens. They are very creative and they make the best out of very adverse conditions. According to human history of the last few centuries, The Somalis are one of the few races, if not the only one, that have prospered and thrived during a difficult period of statelessness. They have escaped the shackles of tin-pot dictators. Except nature’s unpredictable cycles and deliberate and timely livestock import bans by Arab authoritarians, the Somalis, as tradition demands, are quietly becoming self-sufficient. They have built roads and industries where none existed before. Families and friends have united to make tomorrow a brighter day. With the help of the UN and Kofi Annan, they have tried and have been encouraged to build a federal system of governance.

But this was not good enough for UN political officers. Whether it was a deliberate plan or not, a sub-clan had to be armed and supported; a Somali tin-pot dictator had to be invented; and if a new one didn’t come up, an old one had to be revived. Regions that achieved stability and made economic progress were not good enough for the UN “Aid-Lords” led by Mr. David Stephens and Mr. Randolph Kent; these regions had to be disrupted. With the help of these highly regarded UN political officers, certain Arab dictators and corrupt Djibouti elites, who never came to Somalia’s rescue for the past ten years and who were never pleased with free speech and Al-Jazeera Television or Somali progress, were all of a sudden coming to Somalia’s rescue. If you were surprised, we were too!

For the record, the keen reader knows all about the Middle East and certain Arab dictators, their wicked ambitions and about their oil intentions, but should particularly note that the new player in town, the UN, is the same UN that kicked out the good old USA from the UN Human Rights Commission and replaced it with Sudan! It is believed that Sudan’s long-running civil war has killed over two million people through fighting and starvation. African American groups also accuse the Khartoum regime of enslaving, uprooting and killing the southern Sudanese. Yet, the good old boys at the UN let Sudan chair the UN Human Rights Commission. These same UN political officers and their UN’s IRIN Information Networks never heed the Somali cries for justice, land and property. They also conveniently ignore reports of massacres, depredation, looting, uprooting, rape and torture subjected by certain Somali sub-clans to others. And the UN political officers’ foolish notion persists: let the uprooted, pillaged and deprived Somalis lie down with the looting, uprooting and massacring sub-clan militias!

Having read the above commentary and having in mind the ingenuity, productivity and the irrepressible entrepreneurship of the American businesses and public, while the UN’s actions are temporarily harmful, it should be clear to all that the thoughts of the world’s tin-pot dictators and old hat UN bureaucrats are irrelevant to the American public and to the rest of the world; and while at it, let these characters count the number of nations on the face of the earth that really count. And it should be clear to all that the Somali people will soon count too and will overcome the shackles of these UN political officers, Arab dictators and sub-clan militia uprooters. And by now, we hope, you know the rest of the story. For UN ‘Aid-Lords’ please remember: “It is justice, not charity, that is wanting in the world.” Hallelujah!

New York- Some time in September, members of the Security Council will receive a “comprehensive report of the Secretary-General” on the Somali situation. This report will be prepared by none other than Sir Kieran Prendergast’s political officers in Nairobi, namely “Aid-Lords” Mr. David Stephens and Mr. Randolph Kent. We predict this will be a summarized report of the UN’s IRIN daily political reports. Northern Recovery Zones will be reported as “unstable” and that the Arta sub-clan’s TNG has “made inroads and is cooperating” with the local authorities. Of course, they will also predict that the southern half of the country is “soon expected to cooperate” with the sub-clan. On Mogadishu, they will blatantly report that the TNG is “in control and is negotiating” with those outside of the sub-clan. And bingo, a TNG ambassador and a Mr. Galaydh cousin and crony will be nominated to the UN post. And the fairy tale will continue! Meanwhile, with the help of these same political officers, certain Arab dictators, sub-clan militias and the ever ambitious Al-Ittihad forces, Somalia again breaks down and is on the brink of another civil war: a civil war of a different kind than that of 1991. If you were confused by previous Somali clan allegiances and alliances, unfortunately, welcome to a newer series premiering soon; and please, never bet against Somali clan alliances. The UN will never help but hinder; so may Allah save the nation!

The Hague - The war criminals who directed Siad Barre’s war against all Somalis, and headed by none other than Mr. AbdiQasim Salad Hassan and certain entourage in Hotel Ramadan, are also today directing other crimes against humanity: the massacres of Baraawe and Kismayo; and the torching of Garasweyne, Hejmacood and Kuunyo-Barrow villages and where most of the resident were either massacred or chased away by the sub-clan militias. We hope the UN and their highly regarded political officers pay close attention to these devastating wars and heinous crimes against humanity committed by the Arta sub-clan. These men in Hotel Ramadan and many others, members of the UN pet project, got us where we are today. The UN should not only pay lip service to human rights abuses, but also should lead the way and show some action. Unless of course, as always, crimes against the Blackman and Africans in particular are not considered real crimes! We sincerely hope it ain’t so.

Kismayo - Is this coastal Somali city, as reported by Yusuf-Garad of the BBC Somali Section and a member of the sub-clan militia, being contested between competing Somali clan militias? Or again, is it a clan war between the indigenous Somali clans against invading sub-clans as suggested on an interview with one of the Somali Internet sites by the Arta sub-clan Premier on August 16^th? Or finally, is it a holy war by the TNG sub-clan militia, as loudly proclaimed on the BBC Somali Section by the head of the TNG and sub-clan leader Mr. AbdiQasim Salad Hassan on August 26th, against the local inhabitants and their supporters? Please note that all three queries have one thing in common: sub-clan militia. Therefore, the question is: whose sub-clan militia?

Facts: Mr. AbdiQasim Salad Hassan’s TNG has no national army; and outside of the sub-clan members, there is no Somali Transitional National Government recognized by Somalis. Clearly, the TNG sub-clan has a sub-clan militia promoted by the UN political officers and financed and armed by Arab interests; and the militia is strictly that of Mr. AbdiQasim’s sub-clan. His sub-clan hails from the central Somali region of Galgaduud. It is not a region blessed with farmlands, but famous for breeding healthy livestock. Again, the question is: what are his sub-clan militias doing near the Equator? Of course, the answer is simple and as follows: since they already have looted Mr. Aideed and his Sa’ad sub-clan spoils of war, Mr. Hassan wants to legitimize and legalize the remainder of his sub-clan’s spoils of war and plunder some more in the name of Transitional National Government (TNG); a transition from a looter to a legal owner! And now you know the rest of the story!

IRIN - UN Office for the Coordination of Humanitarian Affairs, a misnomer, should be appropriately renamed the UN Office for the Coordination of instability in East Africa! We still await their humanitarian reports dealing with the sad humanitarian affairs in Somalia! What was the last IRIN-East Africa report that dealt with the massacres, depredation, looting, uprooting, rape and torture of Baraawe, Marka and Kismayo city residents? What was the last IRIN humanitarian report about the despicable human and human rights abuses and conditions in the city-state of Djibouti? None; but of course, plenty of hell-bent Somalia political reports, news fabrications and editor/reporter fantasies! And of course, more headlines that mimic the other sub-clan militia radio, the BBC Somali Section.

BBC Somali Section - The sub-clan militia radio broadcasters and reporters at the BBC Somali Section and their reporters in Mogadishu are in full alert! Warning: don’t believe their news reports, as always, it is an outlet for the sub-clan fantasies. By the way, if and when they do, did anyone ever wonder how IRIN and the BBC Somali Section choose their sources? It seems it is always two or three individuals all having the same political base and believe! And once they attempt to divert from that ‘unwritten rule’ then, you never hear from them again. Did you also notice how the head of BBC Somali Desk punishes its own reporters that dare to report the truth and divert from the ‘unwritten rule?’ Remember a certain BBC reporter in Garoowe! Oops, you are not supposed to know these rules of the game! Stay tuned to more sub-clan dirty little secret revelations.

TO ALL OUR SUPPORTERS AND CONCERNED SOMALIS:

Thank you very much for your support in the ARENA OF IDEAS in these trying times. The true and tested hard working and devoted Somalis need leadership and unbiased information. We will try our very best to provide that. To other Somalis on the fence: the days of one clan forcefully dominating the other are over. If each one of us doesn’t clean his/her own house, nobody will clean it for us! For all the young men and women: don’t waste your time in this clan rubbish. Stay in school; we may need you someday. For the few who disagree, please be specific in where we err, if we do at all! For the despondent and for now futile diaspora, please earn a decent paycheck and stay away from the Internet; it may be bad for your health!

SHASNA* Editorial Board
cc: SHASNA Members
Email: Shantasomali@aol.com